I just realized that we will be in Russia when the GOP has its national convention. Damn, we are so lucky! It will do wonders for my blood pressure that I will be enjoying simple cuisine at stops in the countryside while the Tea Party types are serving them selves up some deep southern fat fried fat. Do you want to bet they will rally behind that terrible Russian female rock band, Pussy Riot, to show they are real men who care. Except they are the ones who continue to want to control women's uteruses and push for more Patriot Act type legislation while at the same time suppressing the vote of poor people.
Hell, I might even eat some borscht in celebration of being far away while this nauseous confab occurs. You have to know that in my book beets rank right up there with liver, lima beans and okra as the food of demons. If I am wrong about my lack of religious beliefs then that is what I will be eating in hell.